LIVE: Chippewa Falls WI on Saturday June 6th!

THE DIRTY JOKES AND MAGIC TRICKS SHOW poster

“The Dirty Jokes & Magic Tricks Show” live at The SandBar & Grill (17643 50th Ave., Chippewa Falls, WI 54729) on SATURDAY, JUNE 6th, 2015. Showtime is 9:07 PM, but arrive early for drinks and good seats. Weather permitting, this special event will be held outdoors. Tickets are only $12 in advance, or $17 on the day of the show. LIMITED SEATING – TICKETS ON SALE NOW. Visit the SandBar, or call them at 715-723-1266 to see if any tickets are left. For more information about the show, visit http://DirtyJokesAndMagicTricks.com

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LIVE: Prairie du Chien Wisconsin on Friday June 5th!

THE DIRTY JOKES AND MAGIC TRICKS SHOW poster “The Dirty Jokes & Magic Tricks Show” live at Leisure Time Sports Bar & Bowl (1618 S Marquette Rd Prairie Du Chien WI 53821) on FRIDAY, JUNE 5th, 2015. Showtime is 9:07 PM, but arrive early for drinks and good seats. Tickets are only $10 in advance, or $15 on the day of the show. LIMITED SEATING – TICKETS ON SALE NOW. Visit Leisure Time, or call them at 608-326-2782 to see if any tickets are left. For more information about the show, visit http://DirtyJokesAndMagicTricks.com

Probably The Most [NSFW] Pep-Talk For Aspiring Entertainers You’ll Ever Read

Warning-Politically-IncorrectI wish I could talk to every aspiring live entertainer, one-on-one, while they’re still fresh and enthusiastic, and haven’t yet become jaded and soul-crushed.

I’d walk in, point at him, and demand, “You! Stand up. Tell me your story. What are you going to do? What are your goals? What’s your dream?”

And as he starts, I’ll cut him off with, “Shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down.”

And if he *DOES* shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down, I’ll tell him to stand the fuck back up.

I would do that because, when I was just starting, nobody ever told me to stand the fuck back up, but if someone had – as simple as it seems – it would have saved me a TON of frustration, confusion, and anger in this showbiz journey.  So I’m telling you now: stand the fuck back up.

Because showbiz is FILLED with shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down, and you can’t let something as little as shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down derail you.

You’re gonna get shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down from club owners and event-planners and booking agents, you’re gonna get shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down from more than a few unruly audiences, you’re gonna get shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down from fellow entertainers who are envious of your originality, you’re gonna get shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down from professional critics and anonymous internet douchebags alike, you’re gonna get shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down from industry suits who think they know your voice and audience better than you do, and you’re gonna get shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down from your closest family and friends when they try to convince you to walk away from your aspirations so you can be just as unhappy as they are, out of jealousy that is thinly-veiled as “caring.”

And – worst of all – you’re gonna get shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down from that little voice in your head. That’s the tough one.

But you gotta keep plugging away, keep working, keep writing, keep creating, keep experimenting, keep getting onstage, keep believing in yourself, and keep sticking to your guns, despite all the shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down.

Stand up tall… look your shut-the-fuck-up-and-sit-the-fuck-down square in the eyes… and tell it to SHUT THE FUCK UP and SIT THE FUCK DOWN.

Because you’ve got a lot of motherfuckers to prove wrong.

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If you’re an entertainer… click here:
http://10xYourGigs.com
You can thank me later.
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”A true great artist at heart never ceases to create, continuously amazes and keeps sharing his gift despite barriers, judgement, fears and dreaded myths. If you stopped being creative out of fear or loss of self-esteem or pride, you were never an artist first and foremost for you have ran away from your true calling.”
– Elizabeth E. Castillo